Ether huffers continue to persist in their delusion they can build a "DAO", nearly four years after it was revealed the platform is irreparably broken. The developers behind "MakerDAO" are still scrambling to minimize the SFYL after "network congestion" caused prices updates to lag and so permitted enterprising individuals to swipe over $4 million USD in ETH from users participating in the scheme (archived). Continue reading
Category Archives: Weather
Former Florida Mayor Caught With Overdosed "Male Companion" And "Methamphetamine Appearing Substance"
Andrew Gillum, former Mayor of Tallahassee and DNC backed Florida gubernatorial candidate last election cycle, was found by police while allegedly too inebriated to communicate after the cops were called in response to the drug overdose of a male companion of Gillum (archived). Continue reading
Inconvenience Today: Italy Shuts Down "non-essential" Businesses, Pandemic Declared, CME Closes Trading Floor, And More SFYL
The novel coronavirus panic is inciting ever higher levels of inconvenience:
- Italy has declared a quarantine for the entire country and ordered all businesses with the exception of pharmacies, food markets, and selected "essential" factories shuttered until at least March 25th (archived).
- The "World Health Organization" declared the spread of the novel coronavirus a pandemic.
- The Chicago Mercantile Exchange will be closing its trading floor after the close of business Friday (archived).
- The NCAA "March Madness" basketball games will be closed to fans (archived).
- US stocks continue suffering: DJIA down 5.86%, S&P 500 down 4.89%, and NASDAQ down 4.7% (archived)
- A "containment zone" has been set up surrounding New Rochelle, New York's seventh largest "city" after racking up 178 confirmed cases and at least 1000 in quarantine following synagogue exposure to the local patient zero (archived)
Jury Hangs After Prosecution Fails To Make CIA "Vault 7" Case
The show trial of Joshua Schulte, a USG servant who was accused of leaking CIA-authored malware, has ended with a hung jury (archived). Schulte remains in USG custody. Continue reading
Circuit Breakers And Blood – Fiat Markets Open With Losses
The losses that started with Asian markets opening continued as European and North American markets opened leading to "circuit breaker" trading halts as stock indexes fell faster than fiat market operators could deign to tolerate (archived). Italian markets have been hit particularly hard as the novel coronavirus has managed to thrive there leading to the quarantine of 15 regions. In the past 20 years, only the reopening of the NYSE in the aftermath of 9/11 and October 23rd, 2008 rival the S&P 500 ETF's opening losses today. Sorry for your loss.
Oil Futures Crash As Asian Markets Open For The Week With Russia And OPEC Declining To Agree To Production Cuts
As Asian markets opened for this week's trading, futures of the benchmark Brent and West Texas Intermediate crude oils both dropped more than 20 percent (archived, archived). Continue reading
University Of Tennessee Knoxville Professor To Prison For Simultaneous Affiliations
Last month USG.DoJ began the process of transferring former University of Tennessee Knoxville Engineering professor An Ming Hu (WoT:nonperson) to the Bureau of Prisons, potentially cutting his welfare benefits substantially over Hu's similtaneous affiliations with NASA and Beijing University of Technology (archived, archived). Continue reading
Lebanon's Diab Announces Default On Eurobond Debt
Lebanese Prime Minister Hassan Diab announced today that his government will not pay a 1.2 billion USD Eurobond debt due on Monday, March 9th (archived). Continue reading
IRCG's Hossein Salami Publicly States Possibility of Cornonavirus Being US Bioweapon Attack As Much Of Iran's Government Afflicted
With numerous senior members of Iran's government stricken by the novel coronavirus, Revolutionary Guard leader Hossein Salami made a public statement raising the possibility that the outbreak is the result of a US bioweapon attack (archived). On January 3rd the USG assassinated Iranian Quds Force Major General Qassem Soleimani inside Iraq while there on diplomatic business at Iraq's invitation. Iran retaliated with precision ballistic missile strikes on USG positions in Iraq which the USG humiliatingly could not answer with anything other than token sanctions.
While Salami is merely raising the possibility of USG culpability at this point, the USG's credibility on the international stage is locked into a steep downward spiral.
Control Of "Steem" Altcoin Network Successfully Sold Despite Challenger
Yu Chen Sun (WoT:nonperson), former Ripple “Chief Representative” in China and student of “failure education” based Hupan University, faced an attempted rape of his recently purchased Steem pre-mine on Sunday (archived, archived, archived, archived).
He executed in cooperation with the Poloniex, Binance, and Huobi exchanges Monday a counter-rape using the Steem staked on those exchanges and regained control of his altcoin's network (archived).
Steem, created by Daniel Larimer (WoT:nonperson) in 2016, was last raped that same year. Although Sun can now change the “decentralized” altcoin seemingly at will, he has announced no plans that would prevent future rapes.