Category Archives: North America

US Third Party Candidate's Ad Buy Spotted In The Wild

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Evidence of a radio ad buy on behalf of United States Libertarian party presidential candidate Gary Johnson was observed in the wild. This morning while the Qntra editor in chief was driving his motor carriage to buy cigarettes he heard a Gary Johnson presidential advertisement on KMOX during their broadcast of the Rush Limbaugh show.

Ad buys by candidates outside of the two major socialist political parties in the United States are an extreme rarity with rare exceptions like the 1992 candidacy of Ross Perot that spoiled the election for George Herbert Walker Bush and ushered in the Clinton I presidency.

The move suggests that in addition to having the money to buy ads, Gary Johnson's campaign is making a serious push to raise their already impressive poll numbers across the 15% threshold necessary to be included in the televised debates. Johnson's chances of winning the November election are slim, but given the major party candidates' historically and consistently low likability, approval, and job readiness polling numbers, there is a solid1 chance Johnson makes the televised debates and draws enough votes to spoil the election for one or both of the major party candidates. Peace in our time.

  1. ~35% Enough to happen, but not enough to refer to as likely  ↩

Florida Appeals Espinoza Decision, Florida's Status At Stake!

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The government of Florida, a peninsular territory that hangs from the United States mainland like a limp penis with collapsed veins from years of IV drug use and subject to swampy decay, has decided to appeal a decision by one of their judges and imperil their place in the future. The United Kingdom faced a similar dilemma and decided to walk the lonely road to irrelevance. Peace in our time, but who knows about Florida's.

Cost Of Wrong Kitty Litter Escalates Into The Billions Following Nuclear Waste Accident

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The Los Angeles Times reports that the estimated cost of cleaning up a 2014 underground containment failure at a nuclear waste storage site in New Mexico is climbing past the two billion United States dollar mark (archived). The failure occurred at a facility located within an underground salt dome. A container holding Plutonium and Americium waste failed because organic kitty litter used as a binding agent reacted with the waste creating gas that lead to an explosion reportedly contaminating 35% of the space in the underground facility. Using inert mineral kitty litter would have prevented this accident.

The accident has lead to a cavalcade of fail1 as the facility's unsafety has lead to delays in sequestering waste from "temporary" storage at former nuclear weapons facilities including the notorious Hanford Site there. This means that in addition to the costs imposed by attempts to restore this salt dome to safety the accident has forced the United States Government to breach agreements with a number of state and local governments for failure to dispose of their nuclear trash according to agreed upon schedules. It has also threatened to bring the United States into violation of International Treaties with Russian and other nuclear powers on the reduction of weapons grade material.

The immediate cost of cleaning up after this breach is set to eclipse the Three Mile Island incident in absolute dollars, and the total cost imposed by the fallout is likely to eclipse Three Mile Island in inflation adjusted dollars. The latest alleged USMS auction of Silk Road-ish Bitcoins at 1.6 million United States dollars for 2700 Bitcoins can do nothing for the fiat order when it has debts like this. Sorry for your loss, but you should have read the label on that kitty litter.

  1. This is not unlike the situation US farmers chose trading their windbreaks and their neighbor's orchards for a season's soybean harvest.  ↩

PayPal Freezes Bundy Accounts Over Rebellion Against Federal Government

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Paypal has frozen accounts associated with Cliven Bundy and his Nevada ranch. Cattle rancher and American Patriot Cliven Bundy was captured by Federal Forces in Portland while he was travelling to support his sons following their effort to liberate a portion of the high desert in Oregon. Cliven's sons Ammon and Ryan had already been captured in an incident which left Ryan injured by gunshot and Lavoy Finicum murdered by FBI stooges. Meanwhile the only Federal officer to face charges of terrorism in United States courts was indicted for playing with gift cards. Peace in our time.

Noodle Bricks Overtaking Smokes As US Prison Currency Standard

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According to a recent report by Michael Gibson-Light, doctoral student at the University of Arizona’s school of sociology, the ubiquitous Ramen noodle pack is fast replacing tobacco as the currency of choice amongst US prisoners. Gibson-Light conducted the study over the course of a year while conducting research for another project, and attributes the rise in value being due to substandard nutrition that inmates are now receiving due to budget cuts in prisons nationwide. Inmates often exchange the soup packs, which cost less than $1 in prison commissaries, for items of much higher value. In the prison where the study was conducted, one pack could fetch an inmate 5 handmade cigarettes worth approximately $2, and other assorted sundries were often valued in soup packs. Other inmates used ramen to pay for such services as laundry or cell-cleaning. Violence has been known to erupt over ramen bought on credit when the noodly debts went too long unpaid. Mr Gibson-Light concluded the study by stating that "The shift from tobacco to ramen highlights how dire the nutritional standards at prisons has become." Gresham's Law bitch! Sorry for your loss.

Dicamba Disaster Continues Destruction

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As the story of the Dicamba Disaster in the United States begins finally reaching mainstream media outlets, the St Louis Post Dispatch brings us news that Dicamba Drift has threatened Missouri's largest peach orchard (archived). Two hundred and fifty acres of the orchard's peach trees are already irreparably harmed and as the damage continues to show that number could double by next spring as the injury progresses.1

Dicamba has been around since 1942. Until this year it had largely survived in its humble role as that thing you add as a tiny fraction of a percent to your tank mix as a little kicker to beat back broadleaf weeds. What it did, what it didn't do, and why it stayed that tiny fraction were established. Why it stayed the tiny fraction is that dicamba is volatile and the dicamba that doesn't get absorbed and bound will vaporize and spread.

The ascendancy of Roundup Ready in the 1990's inspired much panic. "Genetic modifications AND a super herbicide?" Glyphosate however turned out to be a kitten with the surfactants mixed with it carrying a greater hazard to fauna than the herbicide itself, flora was still fucked though.2

Monsanto opened a pandora's box with their latest offering, because when you offer desperate farmers soybeans that won't suffer any losses with two herbicides those farmers are getting as much mileage out of those two herbicides as they can. Bad behavior becomes mandatory, because fuck that other family's peach orchard which took a generation to grow. Also no one cares about the other stands of mature trees yellowing, defoliating, and in clear decline.3

It would likely have not made things much better even if Monsanto released their "less volatile" dicamba with the seeds4 so long as other people were selling classic Dicamba preparations for less. The competition between agriculture and chemistry is leaning decidedly in chemistry's favor with crops outside of the limited Monsanto supplied corns and alt-corns becoming environmentally impracticable. US agriculture at this point appears to on track to become a fiefdom of tort law in the same way US medicine is by this time next year. This is the story of your loss and imazapyr resistant crops can't come soon enough (archived).

  1. And even in the absence of further dicamba applications nearby it will continue to progress.  ↩

  2. But only if the glyphosate solution actually made contact with foliage.  ↩

  3. This phenomena is pointedly NOT limited to the portions of the Ozarks that US based media is suggesting it to be. ↩

  4. It seems likely they anticipated the destruction and didn't want their preparation taking the blame.  ↩

Man Jailed After Allegedly Spiking Utah Police Sergeant's Lemonade

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A fast food worker remains jailed after a police sergeant in Layton, Utah alleges the man "spiked" his lemonade with methamphetamine and tetrahydrocannabinol (archived). While methamphetamine is water soluble and capable of entering into solution with lemonade, tetrahydrocannabinol is incapable of entering into solution with water strongly suggesting that if tetrahydrocannabinol appeared on the Sergeant's drug screen it is because he likes to get himself high. Continue reading →

Alleged Orlando Shooter's Father Seated Behind Hillary At Rally

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Alleged Orlando shooter Omar Mateen's (WOT:nonperson) father was prominently seated behind Hillary Rodham-Clinton (WOT:nonperson) at a political rally in Kissimmee, Florida. Omar Matteen's father Seddique Mir Mateen (WOT:nonperson) left Afghanistan in the 1970's and has for years produced a number of videos where he claims the title "Revolutionary President of Afghanistan." There has been no mention in the mainstream media about how Hillary's ties to an insurgent leader may affect her relationship as president with the presently US backed government of Ashraf Ghani (WOT:nonperson) in Afghanistan.

Former Illinois Governor Loses Convictions But Keeps Prison Sentence

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Former Illinois governor Rod Blagojevich (WOT:nonperson) was cleared on 5 of the 18 charges he was convicted of though his 14 year prison sentence was maintained in full during a re-sentencing hearing today. Blagojevich was the Governor of Illinois and the de facto head of the Democratic party in that state when Hussein Bahamas was allowed to move from the Illinois State Senate to the United States Senate and eventually the United States Presidency.

As the sitting Governor of the Illinois Blagojevich was arrested when sloppy operational security exposed the auction he was holding to sell Hussein's vacant United States Senate seat. He is scheduled to be released in May 2024 during the second term of either Hillary Rodham-Clinton or Donald Trump-Clinton's presidency. Blagojevich became a politician when his amateur boxing career ended following a loss by technical knock out in the 1975 Chicago Golden Gloves tournament. Sorry for your laws.

Louisiana Enacts and New York Considers Protecting Law Enforcement With Hate Crime Laws

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A new trend emerging in regional legislatures governing subdivisions of the United States are efforts to protect "law enforcement" officers by passing "Blue Lives Matters" laws making attacks on police subject to enhanced penalties as "hate" crimes. Apparently the existing mechanism for enhanced penalties, which work because attacking a "law enforcement" officer is already its own unique additional criminal charge, aren't working. Tensions between "law enforcement" and the public are high for a number of reasons. Peace in our time.