8 Year Old Dorm Building Explodes On US Campus

Wounded dorm buildingA natural gas explosion gutted the 8 year old Richmond Residential College dormitory at Kentucky's Murray State University. This is the second major headline grabbing fire safety failure of a government owned facility for warehousing persons this month, though claimed casualties were limited to one wounded body due to the summer break.

Information on the building's anticipated lifespan at the time it was designed in unavailable. There is a high probability that the state run University will try pass blame for the dormitory's failure off on either plumbing materials or the plumbing profession.

Fake News Organizations Begin Bleeding, Showing Fatigue

The sustained assault on elected United States President Donald Trump by the leftist Fake News media is beginning to take its toll on the assailants. Major television Fake News outlet CNN institute executive level review of stories concerning Russian fake news after a fake news story attacked a protected member of the establishment.

Meanwhile the Fake Lady, the New York Times, is being sued for defamation by former Alaska governor and US Vice Presidential candidate Sarah Palin (archived). In order to deflect from their role in inciting political violence, the paper resurrected a long debunked claim they originally made 6 years ago blaming Sarah Palin's political activities for inciting the violence they actually incited. The long delay between the claim's debunking and its resurrection all but ensures a court ordered redistribution of wealth from the New York Times to Sarah Palin.

While the Fake News standard bearers are depleting their resources, Trump appointees are beginning to have an impact in their new jobs.

Poor Brits Evacuated From Their Warehousing In Green Incinerators

Following a 30 minute apartment tower to oven conversion earlier this month which claimed at least 79 lives, thousands of impoverished Brits are being evacuated from their government sponsored storage. The Grenfell inferno that triggered the current round of evacuations was fed by flammable insulating foam cladding applied to the exterior of the building in the name of "Green" energy conservation.

As of this writing more than 4,000 people have been made internal refugees of the United Kingdom due to the government's disregard for fire safety as it pursued it's "Green" efficiency fetish while remodelling the facilities that once stored these new refugees. The type of insulation which converted the Grenfell tower to an oven is banned in high rise applications outside the United Kingdom for fire safety reasons, and is at least nominally banned inside the United Kingdom as well.

Prime Minister Theresa May has not answered whether the Government was aware it had banned the sort of flammable cladding applied to its warehouses for the poor. May, whose government has now been saddled with the expense of catching up on deferred maintenance on an emergency basis for these warehouses, further insisted that Airstrip One no es un pais pobre.

Arkansas Plant Board Sends Emergency Dicamba Ban To Governor Amid "Continued Dicamba Destruction Xtend (TM)(R)"

In the second growing season since Monsanto released their "Xtend Crop System" featuring dicamba resistant soybeans and cotton, the Arkansas State Plant Board has been moved to propose an emergency ban on the in-crop use of dicamba outside of traditional applications of the herbicide to pasture land. The emergency ban now awaits the Governor's approval following an 11-3 endorsement by the Plant Board.

Monsanto's response to the proposed ban has been to point out that 33 other states have been perfectly happy telling their trees and non-Monsanto broad leaf crops to get fucked. Monsanto's Christi Dixon seriously proposes1 bailing out the customers of one her employer's products, a product which still grows and yields a crop without being "nourished" by this particular herbicide, by fucking everyone in Monsanto allowing territories over.

Enjoy the amber waves that did not live long enough to yield grain. Sorry for your loess.


  1. Having her employer in the byline leads to the assumption that the work is not intended as a satirical piece  

Bitcoin Latecomers Try Pumping Blockchain.info Flush With Fiat Cash

Blockchain.info announced they have received another $40 million in filthy fiat venture capitalist funding from bandwagon Bitcoin latecomers like billionaire Richard Branson, Lakestar, and Google Ventures. Blockchain.info opened for business in 2011 and claims to be the world's largest "online Bitcoin wallet service". The last round of funding it received in 2014 amounted to 30.5 million USD and was used to make such earth-shattering improvements as numerous trivial UI changes, creation of weak pseudo-random number generating software, and an abundance of downtime gold that would make Coinbase green with envy. The latest round of funding is expected to swirl down the toilet just as quickly as the previous batch, leaving copious amounts of "Sorry For Your Loss" in its wake. (archived)

Violence Today: One Arrest, Another Suspect At Large For Threatening Trump

Two separate incidents of threats against elected United States President Donald Trump have been handled in very different ways. An Edwardsville1 man was arrested for issuing the following utterance on Facebook:

Guess what Trump? I’m waiting for the right time…and I KNOW your (sic) Putin’s (expletive)! The secret service now has a heads up as to my plan to assassinate Trump…let’s see if they act.

Meanwhile left wing activist, organizer, and recreational actor Johnny Depp is still at large after issuing the following threat against Trump:

When was the last time an actor assassinated a president?


  1. Edwardsville is 25 miles north of Belleville where the terrorist John Hodgkinson lived and was radicalized by hate.  

The Poofening: Ether Huffers Suffer Price Flash Crash (As Opposed To More Frequently Covered Service Crash)

mETH huffers, who have been anxiously awaiting an event they dub "The Flippening" (Where the Ethereum fiat market cap surpasses that of Bitcoin), instead were treated to visions of "The Poofening" on Wednesday afternoon when the price of Ethereum flash-crashed down to $13. The price recovered to previous levels shortly afterward, thanks to the efforts of seedy exchanges such as GDAX plugging the holes of the sinking ship by suddenly making signing in to their exchange impossible. Reddit tears likely flow freely tonight with one user reporting a SFYL on GDAX when $10k USD worth of ETH was sold at $16. Ethereum still struggles to not implode under the weight of DDoS attacks to its network owing to the uptick of ICO scams using the platform of late.

Georgia Special Election Demonstrates Continued Erosion Of Fake News Influence In US

Trump's GOP has retained yet another seat in the US Congress vacated by the appointment of its occupant to Trump's cabinet. Following Greg Gianforte's win in Montana's referendum last month, an unprecedented amount of money was spent by the International Pantsuit Party in a failed effort to elect their candidate, the pajama boy Jon Ossoff.

Throughout the entire run up to the special election, "polls" presented by the fake news media projected the opposite of what the actual outcome would be. Movement in the presented polls follow the familiar patter where the pantsuit candidate had a strong lead, the polls narrowed, and then the polls were wrong. The fake news talking heads who presented the very wrong polls also advertised their intense coverage of the special election as "THE referendum on the early Trump administration", but then they stopped using that language very soon after the polls closed.

Ford Turns To China To Save Small Cars

The Ford Motor Company announced to day that it would become the first "American" automaker to outsource the manufacturing of a whole passenger car model to China. Ford will be relocating production of it's runty, low margin, and slow selling "Focus" to China while the plant in suburban Detroit currently producing the Focus will be retooled for pickup truck and SUV production.

Previously, mainstream US vehicular imports from China were limited to parts while upstart brands bringing whole vehicles to the US from China typically import budget vehicles with "off-road use only" import papers and street tires to increase their affordability for cash poor American consumers.

Amazon To Pay 13.7 Billion US Dollars For Brick And Mortar Footprint

Today Jeff Bezos' Amazon announced that they would be acquiring the 450 store grocery chain "Whole Foods" in a move that would give the start up a brick and mortar footprint. Previous attempts by Amazon to grow their own brick and mortar presence have highlighted structural problems in the way Amazon grows when left to its own devices.

The 42 US dollar per share price is a 27% premium over Whole Food's closing share price of 33.06 US dollars yesterday. This aggressive move into the low margin grocery business comes as Jeff Bezos is seeking a public bailout over an earlier misadventures in the higher margin education business.