Shinohai's Shitcoin Roundup Xtend: Bitfinex's Token Addiction, Transaction "Acceleration", and itBit Rounding Bug

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Bitfinex, hoping to offer it's userbase more scam tokens to choose from, added cryptocurrency Dash back to it's roster against USD and BTC trading pairs. Bitfinex added the coin in 2014, only to remove it in August of the following year due to low trade volumes. Dash rose to the #3 spot on coinmarketcap.com with a nearly $300 million USD market cap, though price was down -9.04% in the past 24 hours of trading.

BTC.com mining pool, advocates of the Bitcoin Unlimited fork, started offering a new service that allows users to "accelerate" their transactions on the network by paying a fee using a credit card. Pools mining with the Unlimited software claim that blocks are "full" and that an unsafe hard fork is necessary while consistently mining empty blocks.

A hacker known as 4lemon discovered a flaw on itBit exchange that allowed users to send funds that didn't exist from one account to another due to a rounding bug. The user demonstrated he could send 0.000000005 XBT (Less than the trade minimum of 0.00000001) without triggering any sort of error in itBit's trade engine, resulting in SFYL.

The Californian Dilemma Approaching Peak LOL

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The People's Republic of KKKalifornia has found itself in a pickle. While KKKalifornia is actively seeking to secede from the United States because of President Trump's election, KKKalifornia's government is desperately pleading for certain portions of the Trump agenda to be enacted. Namely KKKalifornia wants the portion of The Great Again that involves rebuilding America's infrastructure as the Cali bois who have neglected their home into ruin reject the rest of The Great Again. The arid desert territory's roads are buckling, dams are failing, and the recent, rare deluge which filled their reservoirs is set to break even more of their stuff when the soil dries.

With one hand KKKalifornia neglects its infrastructure while devoting effort to legislating cow flatulence.1 KKKalifornia's crisis is that if one wants a part of The Great Again, one has to accept all of The Great Again. Can KKKalifornia summon the honesty necessary to make amends with Trump and America, or is The Great Again going to pass the once Golden State on by?

  1. And further exports alfalfa to China while pleading thirst.  ↩

Bitcoin Network Mining Difficulty Up Yet Again To 460769358090.71423340 For New All Time High

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The Bitcoin network mining difficulty has risen to 460769358090.71423340 from 440779902286.58917236 in a change of ~4.535 percent. This is in line with last period's rise of ~4.4 percent. Meanwhile fiat/Bitcoin interfaces continue to steadily report record malaise on the fiat side. Reported prices continue to be near or below the 2013 MtGox record low for the US dollar.

Fake News Figure Arrested For String Of Anti Semitic Threats

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The arrested fake news journalistUnited States law enforcement arrested former Intercept fake news writer Juan Thompson for allegedly making a series of anti-semitic threats. The threats which targeted Jewish community centers and the Anti-Defamation League had recently been trumpeted in the fake news media as a symptom of white aggression against minority populations. As evidenced by the picture of Thompson attached to this article, it appears that law enforcement is alleging the threats were perpetrated by a clearly non-white man.

Law enforcement is further alleging that the scheme was perpetrated by Thompson as part of a larger effort to set up an ex-girlfriend as an apparent hater. As usual with cases involving fake news the truth remains elusive.

Another Guest Lecturer Attacked On US Campus

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At Middlebury College1 a guest lecture by Bell Curve co-author Charles Murray was disrupted by students protesters and turned violent as Murray was leaving campus last night. As Murray attempted to speak in the designated auditorium, the noisy disruption was so great that college administrators moved Murrary to a remote room where his lecture was broadcast to the auditorium. Following the speech when Murray was leaving campus agitators attempted to deny him egress by obstructing the path of his ride as well as jumping on the motor vehicle and pounding on it.

Middlebury College Professor Allison Stranger suffered a neck injury while escorting Murray after an agitator grabbed her head and hair then twisted with intent to disassemble the Russell J. Leng '60 Professor of International Politics and Economics. This casualty has only been reported by local media sources, with national media giving the incident sparing attention and ignoring the violent turn.

There is no information available at this time on possible criminal charges. Pence in our Time.

  1. located in Middlebury, Vermont  ↩

A Very Special News Roundup Xtend: Sweden Conscripts, Media Turns To Praise Trump While Knifing Cabinet, Foreign Influence In French Election Overt

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Welcome to a very special edition of the Qntra News1 Roundup Xtend. With the fight to summon The Great Again intensifying, the froth of lulz is spraying all over. Here's a bucket.

  • Sweden has turned to conscription in order to protect Malmo and other "no-go zones" from supposed Russian aggression. Approximately 4,000 men and women will be entered into service on January 1st 2018 from a pool of 13,000 selected for evaluation. There is no word on whether tulpas will count towards those numbers.
  • Following President Trump's nationally televised address to a joint session of Congress the lamestream and fake news media appeared to be headed towards an attempted reset with Trump. Then they came out with the knives and began attacking everyone in the President's circle except the man himself. The current focus of their aggression is Attorney General Jeff Sessions, who apparently committed the crime of being polite, genteel, and southern towards the Russian Ambassador at forgettable social events.
  • Marine Le Pen is now the poll recognized frontrunner in the French presidential election. As a result the parliament of the European Union decided open her to prosecution for "publishing violent images." This overt attempt by foreign European powers to influence the French election is getting little play in the fake news media.

  1. as opposed to earlier editions focusing on items that were not quite news.  ↩

Hoaxtoshi Returns With Fiatist Patent Wank, Forgets Tissues

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Hoaxtoshi has resurfaced from exile, this time teaming up with internet gambling entrepreneur Calvin Ayre in a bid to publish "Bitcoin and blockchain technology" patents. Wright has been working from offices of The Workshop Technologies, located in the UK, on the development of the patent applications according to the investigative report by Reuters. Hoaxtoshi also allegedly had plans to make a presentation to the Government of Antigua in an attempt to make Bitcoin the official currency of the Caribbean nation, though no information exists to document that the presentation actually took place. Ayre coincidentally set up a multi-million dollar call center in the region, though it was shuttered in 2012 to "source more cost effective customer service suppliers" elsewhere. Neither Wright nor Ayre provided comment to reporters for the article. (archived)

Fiat Currencies Appear To Enter Period Of Sustained Malaise

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The thrashing that fiat currencies have taken at fiat/Bitcoin interfaces so far in 2017 continues. The US dollar and the endangered Euro continue trading under 1/1000th of a Bitcoin on fiat emphasized interfaces. Further strong signal from the fiat side bearish to itself is possible after March 11th when the US Securities and Exchange Commission is likely to approve, either by action or inaction, a new "paper"1 Bitcoin linked trading vehicle.

  1. i.e. not actually Bitcoin  ↩

Great Flood Exhibit Becomes Great Leak For Home County

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Grant county, Kentucky – home of Ken Ham's Ark replica – is praying for a torrent of revenue after the Christian themed exhibit has failed to provide a significant amount of money into the town despite an $18 million US dollar tax break. County Judge-Executive Steve Wood said “It’s been a great thing but it’s not brought us any money". A Great Flood of debt is now threatening to sink the town, as the County is on the brink of bankruptcy and is slated to propose job cuts and a 2% payroll cut for all employees. The controversial theme park was funded using $62 million US dollars in Tax Increment Financing granted to the organization by the City of Williamstown.