Desperate Hoaxtoshi Craig Wright Tries To Patent Everything Bitcoin

Serial liar Hoaxtoshi, a.k.a. Craig Wright (WoT: nonperson) is desperately flailing for relevance by spamming 831 patent applications, including one on the original Bitcoin code, to fiat registrars. In regards to patenting the Bitcoin whitepaper and code, he was quoted as saying: Continue reading

Pantsuitist Illinois House Speaker Madigan's Office Hit With Search Warrant

The office of Illinois House Speaker for all but 2 years since 1983, Michael Madigan, was hit with a search warrant by Illinois State Police (archived). The search at least nominally concerns allegations of assault and other misconduct with a sexual flavor by Madigan's former subordinate and former House member Jack Franks. Continue reading

Increasingly Chinese Berkeley Considering Appeasement By Chiseling Donor Name Off Building

Dean Erwin Chemerinsky (WoT:nonperson), a USG propagandist, has moved to change the name of UC Berkeley's Boalt Hall from that of its current namesake, John Henry Boalt (archived, archived). Elizabeth Boalt, whose husband was John Henry Boalt, an Oakland attorney and veteran of the War of Northern Aggression, donated a sizeable sum to the school after his death in 1901. A work by Mr. Boalt’s titled “The Chinese Question,” had helped serve to stop Chinese colonists, known for their exam taking abilities, from entering the US by bolstering support for the Chinese Exclusion Act of 1882. Chinese exclusion in the US survived through Franklin D. Roosevelt's 1943 Magnuson Act .

The move comes as the proportion of students with ties to the Communist Party of China exceeds 17% of the 2019 UC Berkeley freshman class, second only to white students whose population declined to 21% (archived).

France: Uniformed Firefighters And Riot Police Brawl

Firefighters is France brawled with riot police this week after being accosted during demostrations against French despot Macron (archived). The firefighters had been engaging in protest activities like wearing Joker makeup and lighting themselves on fire when a group of firefighters, tiring of seeing their compatriots getting roughed up by the cops, met police violence with firefighter violence. As is standard practice under Macron, police resorted to deploying chemical weapons against the civilian firefighters. Continue reading

Chinese One Dollar Bill Shipment Seized In Minnesota

A shipping container from China was seized by US Customs and Border Protection officials after it was found to contain almost 1 Million USD in allegedly counterfeit single dollar bills (archived). The container arrived via the International Falls port of entry in Minnesota holding 45 packages of dollar notes totaling $900,000. Secret Service agents congratulated themselves on keeping the money out of circulation and upholding their appearance of monopoly on printing approximately 6.6 billion increasingly worthless notes every year.

Some altcoin Forked Off Of Bitcoin Forking Again To Implement Developer Tax On Block Rewards

Roger Ver (WoT:nonperson) and Jihan Wu (WoT:nonperson), have announced a 6 month plan to implement a 12.5% tax on block rewards in order to fund development on their ailing forkcoin project. The developer tax will fuck the altcoin's protocol layer to orphan blocks by miners refusing to participate in the redistribution of wealth towards an entity known only as the "Hong Kong corporation" at press time. Details regarding who will receive funding and how supposedly remains under discussion. Some BCH miners have expressed displeasure with the tax, though BTC.TOP mining pool founder Jiang Zhuoer (WoT:nonperson) claims the issue isn't up for debate, going so far as to quote former Chinese communist party leader Deng Xiaoping in defense of the move:

Non-debate theory is my invention. Non-debate, is to gain time to work hard. When you debate, everything becomes more complicated and it wastes time. Nothing can be done. Don’t debate, and just try. Be brave and experiment.

Plans are for the mandatory tax to become effective on May 15 when their biannual hard fork "update" is scheduled.

Power Rangers Pushing "Taproot" Into Their Bitcoin Network Client Fork

In his continuing mission to wreck Bitcoin, Pieter Wuille (WoT:sipa) has submitted a final proposal for 3 new "BIPs" and a pull request to the "Bitcoin Core" Shithub that will introduce Schnorr signatures and a new mEthereum-like addition called taproot via a "soft fork" to the protocol. Schnorr signature schemes were discussed in #trilema as far back as 2017, and determined to be attractive to PRB users because they are a match made in heaven for individuals using Segwit, multisig, or other "anyone can spend" schemes. Taproot was proposed in January of last year by Greg Maxwell (WoT:gmaxwell) and is an attempt to add "smart contract" functionality to Bitcoin, supporters having quickly forgotten about the SFYL that occurs when one consciously chooses to huff "smart contract" Jenkem. As always, users of actual Bitcoin will not be affected.

Tens Of Thousands Of Armed Inmates Storm Virginia Capital, Fail To Do Anything

Tens of thousands of men stormed Richmond, Virginia yesterday before stopping outside the legislature where they proceeded to not do anything (archived). Despite a handful of USG captures well in advance of the event, the men faced no serious opposition or challenges on their way to the Capitol building as they carried an assortment of infantry weapons. The men even allowed USG forces to capture of women accompanying them. The woman faces felony charges for wearing a mask in public. Local authorities estimate 22,000 armed men showed up and dispersed without challenging them.

USG Sting Apparently Underway In Virginia – Trap Under Cover Of "Pro-Gun" Rally

Tensions are running high in Virginia as at least 6 would-be protesters have been arrested in advance of a rally in support of gun rights (archived). Demographic shifts in Virginia driven by hypertrophy in the USG have lead to a Pantsuitist government voted in by USG bureaucrats colonizing suburbs near DC to advance a whole number of measures objectionable to residents of the rest of the state. This demographic move towards an Illinois like political situation has many longtime Virginia residents very angry. Continue reading