Russian Air Defense Hardware Getting Pretty Good At Intercepting US Missiles

Overnight the US, Airstrip One, and France launched missile strikes against Syria which were condemned by both the Russians and Chinese. Out of 103 missiles launched, 71 were reportedly intercepted leaving 32 to strike targets. This move comes 373 days after Trump last directed US cruise missiles towards a Syrian airbase's pussy. Syria and Russia are reporting that this attack was "absorbed" with personel having been withdrawn from the target sites days in advance while the US insists no warning of the attack was offered.

F-35 Deliveries Halted Again Over Defects And Contract Disputes

The USG Department of defense has suspended deliveries of Lockheed Martin's F-35 fight over ongoing defects including corroded fasteners and a contract dispute over who should pay to remedy the fault present in many already delivered planes (archived). This is yet another blow for the US aerospace industry.

Ingsoc Today: British Baker Under Assault For Eschewing Metric System

A baker attempting to pursue something resembling business in Airstrip One is under fire for selling "sausage rolls" by the inch instead of using a politically correct metric measure of length (archived). A group of Newspeak enforcers calling themselves the "Department of Business, Energy and Industrial Strategy" offered through a spokesman:

You can label a sausage roll, or in fact almost any other product, in imperial measures, but when you're selling the product on the basis of measurement you should always include metric.

US Destroyer And Russian Warplanes Engage In Intimate Activities In Syrian Waters

The latest reports on the situation in Syria indicate the Arleigh Burke class destroyer USS Donald Cook1 is in Syrian waters where it is being intimately buzzed by Russian warplanes. With diplomatic channels between the US and Russia dramatically reduced following British aggitation, Pantsuit just might get their war if this dance continues. Make Green, Great Again!


  1. Launched May 1997