Today the Syrian government announced President Bashar al Assad returned his "Legion of Honor" award to the US pantsuit slave state of France via the Romanian embassy (archived). Former French President Chiraq presented Assad with the decoration in 2001.
Deutsche Bank Fat Fingers 35 Billion USD Payment
German legacy fiat institution Deutsche Bank revealed it had fat fingered an overpayment of 35 billion USD while juggling its collateral accounts. The bank insists the error was corrected within "minutes" of its occurence. Fiat investors only value the bank itself at 24.5 billion USD.
USG.MIL Pursues Single Provider "Cloud" Computing Contract
Substantial butthurt is coming out of the USG Department of bagholding as the US Department of Defense looks to award a 10 year single provider "cloud" computing contract (archived). The feedbeasts marketing commercial "cloud" computes are already crying foul that only one of them will get chosen for the priviledge of serving the most gullible customer in history.
21.co/Earn.com Saga Ends With Coinbase Acquisition
The story of 21.co/Earn.com, a widely hyped venture capital eating startup that never found a niche despite bouncing between pursuits as varied as selling tiny underpowered miners to spam as a service, has ended in an undisclosed but roughly 100 million USD acquisition by Coinbase. The paltry sum which still overvalues the firm is likely to leave many people taking a haircut. As part of the deal former 21.co/Earn.com CEO Balaji Srinivasan has won a sinecure "evangelizing" for Coinbase.
Jewish State Continues Aggressions In Syria
While Russia and Syria have yet to retaliate for recent Anglophone aggression within their borders, the Jewish state continues pursuing aggression against other state actors in Syria (archived).
Russian Air Defense Hardware Getting Pretty Good At Intercepting US Missiles
Overnight the US, Airstrip One, and France launched missile strikes against Syria which were condemned by both the Russians and Chinese. Out of 103 missiles launched, 71 were reportedly intercepted leaving 32 to strike targets. This move comes 373 days after Trump last directed US cruise missiles towards a Syrian airbase's pussy. Syria and Russia are reporting that this attack was "absorbed" with personel having been withdrawn from the target sites days in advance while the US insists no warning of the attack was offered.
Aussies Bringing Shuttered Power Plant Back Online For Electricity Sales To Miners
F-35 Deliveries Halted Again Over Defects And Contract Disputes
The USG Department of defense has suspended deliveries of Lockheed Martin's F-35 fight over ongoing defects including corroded fasteners and a contract dispute over who should pay to remedy the fault present in many already delivered planes (archived). This is yet another blow for the US aerospace industry.
Ingsoc Today: British Baker Under Assault For Eschewing Metric System
A baker attempting to pursue something resembling business in Airstrip One is under fire for selling "sausage rolls" by the inch instead of using a politically correct metric measure of length (archived). A group of Newspeak enforcers calling themselves the "Department of Business, Energy and Industrial Strategy" offered through a spokesman:
You can label a sausage roll, or in fact almost any other product, in imperial measures, but when you're selling the product on the basis of measurement you should always include metric.
Russia Preparing Economic Sanctions Against US Industry
Reports are emerging that Russia is preparing economic sanctions against the US. Among restrictions being considered are a ban on the export of titanium and rocket engines to the US and restrictions on imports of alcohol and tobacco from the US (archived).