Monthly Archives: July 2016

FBI Stooge Affirms Clinton Privilege

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FBI Director James Comey (WOT:nonperson) announced today that his office would be affirming Hillary Rodham Clinton's (WOT:nonperson) Clinton privilege. For the crimes of being a horrible sysadmin, running an email server which leaked US foreign policy secrets, and trying to conceal her violation of the laws concerning the handling of classified information Comey found nothing worth his pressing charges over. Never mind that David Petraeus (WOT:nonperson) , the second coming of Uncle Sam had his career destroyed over less when he faced the criminal charges. Check your1 privilege!2

  1. Clinton  ↩

  2. No, seriously go through your ancestor's belongings to find the family tree and connect it to the Clinton family tree lest you suffer like Ross Ulbricht who had no Clinton privilege.  ↩

Ether Huffers Continue Fall Into Depravity

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Flaming tire fire in a shitpit Ethereum showed signs of fermentation related to the fork today, as prices1 dropped below the $10 mark. 24 hour trading stats on coinmarketcap.com showed a -13.62 % drop at the time of writing, with the DAO also plummeting -18.13 %. Even while Ethereum's Phil Daian (WOT:nonperson) watches his "innovative project" burn to the ground, Buterin (WOT:nonperson) seems to feel he can offer the Bitcoin community advice on how to fix their blocksize issues. His suggestion is to remove transaction signatures.2 The Bitcoin Foundation however has already made it quite clear that that isn't gonna happen. Sorry for your loss.

  1. To the extent jenkem can have a price. Turn out this whole time they thought they were huffing ether it was jenkem all along!  ↩

  2. Transaction signatures are THE most important part of the whole cryptocurrency enterprise from both the crypto and currency perspectives.  ↩

Bitcoin Network Difficulty Up ~1.88% With Subsidy Halving Days Away

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Bitcoin network difficulty went up 1.88 percent from 209453158595.38098145 to 213398925331.32391357 today. This is the last difficulty adjustment before the mining subsidy is cut in half at block 420,000.1 At press time we are at block 419376. Tick, tock, tick, tock!

  1. It also coincides with the anniversary of the BIP 66 Clusterfuck event. Imagine that. Bitcoin has enough history for major "This day in history" type events to begin filling up a calendar. ↩

First Anniversary of BIP 66 Clusterfuck

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One year ago the BIP 66 clusterfuck happened. The chainsplit following the "activation" revealed that many miners were using simplified (and dysfunctional) chain verification, which led to abundant lols and chain splits. Turns out "soft" forks aren't all that soft! More splits happened after the initial split that inaugurated the clusterfuck, and they happened for the same reason. Never forget!

Latest Fork Noise Arrives On Schedule

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This past week supporters of the failed ClassicCoin coup attempt have attempted to socially engineer a fresh round of buzz for their failed effort. They are referring to their latest effort as the "Terminator Plan" which supposes that somehow people are going to switch en masse to their stillborn and irrelevant ClassicCoin client from the moribund and also irrelevant "Core" fork of the reference Bitcoin client.

This time the fork effort had still less fanfare than the original ClassicCoin announcement, just as the ClassicCoin announcement had still less fanfare than the XTCoin announcement which preceded it. The sudden push for the "Terminator Plan" in addition to being exactly on schedule has arrived swiftly after the effort to suppose Bitcoin could be replaced with the ether huffing habit effectively ended.

Discussions taking the "Terminator Plan" seriously have been absent from venues engaging in actual economic activity involving Bitcoin. Most discussions have been limited to English language outlets controlled by Roger Ver1 (WOT:nonperson) and Chinese language outlets similarly removed from actual economic activity despite occasional appearances by miners.

Meanwhile the price reported by fiat/Bitcoin interfaces remain above where it was when the ClassicCoin coup was defeated, which is above where it was when the ClassicCoin Coup was unveiled, which is above where it was when the XTCoin coup was defeated, which is still further above where it was when the XTCoin coup was unveiled.

Beyond all this drama and distraction the miner subsidy halving looms and the economic deterrent to unwelcome forks abides. Sorry for your loss.

  1. Who notably is no longer unable to travel to the United States. As Roger Ver did not arrive on a ship and take the place over, it is probably he made one or more deals with people.  ↩

Symantec Snake Oil Goes Rancid

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Researches with Googles Project Zero security team announced on Wednesday a major vulnerability affecting nearly all Symnatec snake-oil antivirus products. The kernel vulnerability requires no user action, which would allow attackers to corrupt system memory without requiring users to even open an email used to trigger the flaw.

These vulnerabilities are as bad as it gets. They don’t require any user interaction, they affect the default configuration, and the software runs at the highest privilege levels possible. In certain cases on Windows, vulnerable code is even loaded into the kernel, resulting in remote kernel memory corruption.

Symnatec indicated they were not aware of anyone actually exploiting the bug as of yet, and responded by making a new panacea that supposedly fixes the problem.