Acknowledging his campaign to derail a Clinton coronation at the Major United States Socialist Party's national convention isn't in the best of health, Bernie Sanders today announced that he would be "laying off" a number of paid campaign staff members. In socialism everyone is equally without worth and equally unpaid. Sorry for your loss.
Millennials, Apple Reject Capitalism Together
Organs of the Washinton Post bring us dire news on the fate of "Millennials" and the holding company burning the legacy of the late Apple Computer, Inc. A majority of millennials in the United States that responded to a survey have expressed opposition to capitalism. Meanwhile the consumer electronics company selling1 iPnohes and other iCrap has experienced its first year over year sales decline in 13 years. Sorry for your loss.
But not manufacturing, Foxconn does that ↩
Massive Qatar National Bank Leak Circulating
A dump of approximately 15,000 documents from the Qatar National Bank with information on more than 100,000 accounts are now circulating around the web. This catastrophic failure of the fiat system is still smaller than the typical IRS leak. Sorry for your loss.
US Appeals Court Takes Time To Rule On Sportsball Case
Today the Unites States Court of Appeals for the Second Circuit took time out of its day to uphold a 4 game suspension of Tom Brady for cheating in a playoff game according to the rules of the sportsball league. Rather than issue a ruling on any of the legal injustices occuring constantly in the United States, the justices instead chose to issue a ruling on the rules of sportsball consistent with the sportsball league's internal rules.
Failing Radioactive Waste Tanks At Hanford Site Put Pacific Coast On Edge
Various news sources are reporting that as the nuclear waste containment tanks at the Hanford Site along the Columbia River in Washington State age well beyond their 50 year service life leaks are increasing with at least one tank in a condition that could charitably be described as complete failure (archived). A United States Department of Energy Politruk described the horrific outcome as an "anticipated" side effect of efforts to empty the failed tank. The Hanford site is a part of Manhattan Project National Historical Park and administered jointly by the National Park Service and the Department of Energy. Continue reading
Ennetcom Seized, Operator Arrested
Privately owned and centralized encrypted communications Ennetcom was raided by Dutch police and seized while its alleged operator was arrested (archived). Thirty six year old Danny Manupassa is alleged to have been running the network and has ordered him to be held 14 days while police search for actual evidence of criminal activity on the network. Police and prosecutors believe that Ennetcom had users that were involved in organized criminal activity.
Phuctor, the RSA Super-Collider Discovers Vulnerability in Northrop Grumman PGP Root-CA
Phuctor, a public service provided by No Such lAbs has discovered a vulnerability in the Northrop Grumman PGP Root Certificate authority. The public exponent is 16385 a number which is not prime. In fact 16385 has prime factors of 5, 29, and 113. Shame on your Northrop Grumman. Bad defense contractor. Now that Phuctor has returned more lulz are sure to follow. Peace in our time!
Bharara Arrests Another Murgio Over Coin.mx
A spokesperson for the office of Avatar of Injustice Preet Bharara announced the arrest of Michael Murgio on Thursday. The FBI arrested Mr. Murgio in Palm Beach, Fla. on charges of participating in a scheme to allow Bitcoin exchange Coin.mx to take control of a local credit union. Along with his son, Murgio was on of three people named in a indictment regarding the scheme. Prosecutors allege that the defendants hacked into at least a dozen companies' computer networks and stole personal information of 100 million people. A report in Fortune magazine stated that while Murgio was not involved in any of the hacking offenses, he was responsible for the daily operations of Coin.mx and paid bribes amounting to $150,000 to the chairman of the credit union in order to help the exchange appear legitimate (archived).
Phuctor Returns Vastly Improved
Phuctor, a public service operated by No Such lAbs has returned with vastly improved hardware and software. In addition to a quarter terabyte of RAM and better software, an all new "braindamage" section allows viewing especially retarded moduli.
Happy 420 Charlie Shrem
We at Qntra would like to wish Charlie Shrem a happy 420. Rest in peace Shrem's Bong.