Researchers at the Netherland's Radboud University, total enrollment 19,904 students, have confirmed the safe assumption that the onboard encryption offered by a number of SSD makers is indeed homeopathic and useless (archived). They describe what they refer to as a "pattern of critical issues" which allow them the freedom to read nominally encrypted volumes on a number of Crucial and Samsung drive models. Users of Microsoft Window's "Bitlocker" drive encryption are especially vulnerable since "Bitlocker" trusts onboard SSD encryption engines and will forgo applying its own software encryption when an SSD offers to do the encrypting. The "Make Security Theatre Again" movement is alive and well with mainstream hardware and software vendors.
Category Archives: Shitware
Another Intel CPU Sidechannel Leak Documented With The Leak Dependent Once Again On A Thing Intel Did To Boost Appearance Of Speed
Another issue with Intel CPUs has been documented demonstrating the things are leaking bits from what Intel's marketing labels "secure" parts of CPU cores through a sidechannel made available via the simultanuous multi threading gimmick Intel's marketers labeled "hyperthreading" (archived). This has not been a good year for the accumulated gimmicks Intel has been tossing in their chips to simulate speed.
This vulnerability has been dubbed "Portsmash" as the continued accretion of trendy names for these things shows no signs of stopping.
IBM Buying Red Hat
IBM has reached an agreement to buy Red Hat, paying cash at a price of 190 USD per share (archived). IBM will colocate Red Hat in their "Hybrid Cloud" section. Red Hat ran out of "rebel" and "Innovator" credibility when the red hat inspiring their name was discovered to be a Cornell University lacross team hat, but being bought out by the punch card company is something else.
SystemD Vulnerability Allows Crashing Systems Remotely (And Probably Executing Code Too) With DHCPv6 Packets
The hole-iest of move fast and break things cults, SystemD has had another hole documented (archived). In systemd-networkd the DHCPv6 client will write outside the bounds of its heap when fed the right kind of packet leading to a range of effects depending on the particular packet fed. Chief SystemD thing breaker and professional tumor Leonart Poettering has published a patch which supposedly addresses this particular documented issue while introducing a unknown number1 of new bugs.
And likely unknowable. Can you truly count how many individual bacteria in a gram of sewer effluent are alive or dead at any moment in time? ↩
FBI Brings In Their Bomb Hoax Patsy: Florida Man
The US FBI has recalled a Patsy in their bomb hoax "investigation" arresting the notorious East Coast villain Florida Man. In this incarnation of the meme, Florida man is a 56 year old white male with a white van and a history of prior arrests for making "terroristic threats" (archived).
#NotBombs Culprit Still At Large, FBI Still Prime Suspect
The wave of non-explosive devices addressed to loud Pantsuitists continues. Neither causalties, nor any danger of casualites has been presented. The US Federal Bureau of Investigation still leads the list of suspects, and notably this story appears to be less dominant in the mainstream pantsuit news than their hysteric fits preceeding US Supreme Court Justice Brett Kavanaugh's confirmation were. The only serious question now is which Pantsuit might end up taking one for the team to give this hoax credibility via casualties.
Derps Now Doing DNS Over HTTPS
The ongoing quest to squash DNS traffic has met its latest shitgnome attempt at breaking hygiene in the form of DNS traffic now being mixed into https traffic on port 443 (archived).
US Firm "Facebook" Interfering In Brazil's Presidential Election
Whatsapp, a division of Mark Zuckerberg's Facebook, has banned numerous users in Brazil including Presidential frontrunner Jair Bolsonaro's son in an effort to reduce the number of messages promoting Bolsonaro's campaign on Zuckerberg's US based platform (archived). With the presidential election less than a week away, this is exactly Facebook meddling in a foreign election to favor one candidate over the other.
Considering Facebook's ongoing cooperation with the US Government, it would make all of the sense in the world for Brazil's outgoing Temer administration to strike Facebook and the United States with sanctions.
Tech "Press" Touting Latest Google Fritz Chip
Adulation in the Pantsuited tech press is making the rounds for Google's latest Fritz chip, The Titan M (archived). Implanted into their latest pnoHes, the Titan M is designed to frustrate and arrest any attempt by device purchasers to own their devices. An investigation of Google's CR50, their netbook Fritz chip painted a dire picture for anyone hoping to own hardware made for Google.
9 "Proud Boys" Charged By NYPD After Being Ambushed By Antifa NPC Mob
Following a GOP event in Manhattan, 9 members of Vice media founder Gavin McInnes's "Proud Boys" alt-Right fan club are facing assault charges after they were ambushed leaving the event (archived). The NYPD provided and enforced seperate egress paths from the event for Antifa NPC mobs and other parties in attendance. Six antifa aggressors doubled back along the other route after exiting the high density police zone waylaying the group of 9 Proud Boys, impeding their travel, and initating violence. The Proud Boys successfully defended themselves in the encounter.
Pantsuit media raised hell framing the event as a "white supremacist" attack on the part of the largely hispanic group of Proud Boys leading to arrests, charges, and what will surely be a very expensive ordeal for New York Pantsuits. Members of the defeated Antifa NPC Mob are not cooperating with police for reasons.