US Prepares To Tackle Illegal Immigration… With Facial Recognition Wank For Folks LEAVING The US

As progress on Trump's wall is slowed due to his captiulation on budgeting, US airlines are being compelled to engage in facial recognition scans for departing passengers in the name of combatting illegal immigration (archived). It appears construction of the metaphorical wall is indeed proceeding, but this one aims to keep people in. While all the popular talk is on immigration, the barriers are going up to stop emigration.

In US Capital Pro-Maduro Protestors March Against Guaidó At Embassy

Three months after the US Color revolution in Venezuela began and faltered, protesters are marching in DC to prevent allies of US stooge and Macron look-a-like Guaidó's chosen diplomats from taking possession of the embassy (archived). Or as the protestors describe themselves:

A group of U.S. citizens, angered by the U.S.-orchestrated attempt to topple the Venezuelan government, has established an Embassy Protection Collective (Collectives for Peace) to keep the embassy from falling into the hands of the unelected opposition

The elected government of President Nicolas Maduro remains in control of the Venezuelan embassy to the US though the US Secret Service seized the military attache’s office March 18th. The Venezuelan Consulate in New York has also been captured by US backed forces.

Mexican Troops Draw Weapons, Make US Soldiers Their Bitch On US Side Of Rio Grande

A handful of Mexican troops operating on the US side of the Rio Grande drew weapons on two US soldiers in a border patrol vehicle and disarmed the US forces on what is nominally US soil (archived, archived). The US military and Department of Homeland Security have allegedly requested an "explanation" from the Mexicans.

MBA Grad Takes Revenge On Alma Mater's Computers With USB Device

Vishwanath Akuthota, a 2017 MBA graduate of the College of Saint Rose in Albany returned to the school this February to bring his vengance to the school's computers (archived). Akuthota used a commercially available USB Killer device to fuck some shit up as he filmed himself using the device. The device took the 5 volt USB power output to charge its reserves and then delivered a -220 volt discharge, repeatedly. This attack vector works on any device too lazily and cheaply engineered to include surge protection for both positive and negative voltages built into the USB ports.

Akuthota is allege to have caused ~60,000 USD in damage.

Google Hit With Multi Million Dollar Cleanup Fee After Withdrawing Experimental Fiber Service From Louisville

Google's experiment in deploying a city wide fiber optic network through road "nano-trenching" has left Google paying Louisville 3.8 million USD to clean up the mess (archived). The project involved placing fiber optic cables 1-2 inches deep in road surfaces throughout the city and covering the trenches with an epoxy mix. The experiment showed tires are adept at tearing the epoxy out of road surfaces receiving any appreciable traffic.

Google insisted on the shallow nano-trenches over more proven depth and cover combinations despite objections on Louisville's part. The objections were overcome by offering Louisville the opportunity to take part in the experiment or get no Google fiber network at all (archived). Now the city has no Google fiber network, an ongoing hazard on its roads, and an agreement from Google to pay only a portion of the experiment's cleanup costs.

Pantsuitists Flaff In Outrage Over Trump Administration Proposal To Concentrate Costs Of Pantsuitist Migration Policies In Pantsuit "Sanctuary Cities"

Pantsuitists are up in arms and crying scandal over a proposal which would have, and may yet sent detained migrants awaiting court hearing to cities adopting "sanctuary" policies protecting undocumented migrants (archived). The same Pantsuitists opposed to any restrictions in movement for the world's poor and who further adopted legislation with the apparent aim of attracting the world's poor to municipalities under their control… find preferentially busing migrants released from detention to the cities with laws on the books welcoming them to be a bridge too far. Shouldn't they be competing to maximize the share of the world's poor headed their way?

Ecuador To Recieve 4.2 Billion USD IMF "Extended Fund Facility" (Coincidentally British Police Managed To Arrest Former Ecuador Embassy Resident Julian Assange Inside Embassy)

Ecuador has ended their asylum for Anglophone dissident Julian Assange after nearly seven years of providing the rebel sanctuary in their London Embassy (archived). In what is surely completely unrelated development the US directed International Monetary Foundation has approved a 4.2 billion USD "Extended Fund Facility" to provide (archived):

support for the Ecuadorean government’s economic policies over the next three years.

The deal allowed the immediate disbursment of 652 million USD to the government of Ecuador when it was announced in March. Following Assange's arrest inside the Embassy on a five year old British process warrant the US published an indictment of Assange. This was quite the bounty to be paid for a single head by an increasingly poor US.

Heroic Roomba Occupies Numerous Oregon "Law Enforcement" Man Hours In Standoff

Numerous Oregon police officers were called to respond to the calls of a panicked woman afraid of a bathroom invader.  Multiple Sheriff's department deputies and at least one K-9 officer were diverted to attend to the situation. Guns drawn the agents of the criminal US government opened the bathroom door only to discover a floor cleaning robot trapped in the bathroom (archived).

Google Gives Up On Assembling AI Ethics Panel Over Irreconcilable Political Differences

Google's effort to put together an ethics advisory panel failed after the inclusion of a single member of a conservative leaning centerist political organization organization caused many of Google's other selections to quit (archived). Kay Cole James, the "problem" nominee is president of the Heritage Foundation, an organization which has been an infuential part of the US's political mainstream as evidenced by decades of successful political lobbying. Google announced they would abandon the effort but surely try something again soon.

Outrage specifically centered around comments made by James on transgender issues where he advocated positions which would not have been contested in mainstream US political discourse before the second Hussein Bahamas administration. However irreconcilable differences are becoming normal in US politics and Silicon Valley social engineering firms like Google are increasingly drivers of the division.

46 Pantsuitist Candidates Already Lined Up For Presidential Primary Showdown

The field of candidates to take the Pantsuitist position challenging Trump in the 2020 election has swollen to 46, a figure that only includes declared candidates. Undeclared candidate, frontrunner, and former assistant to Hussein Bahamas, Joe Biden is facing an early obstacle as Pantsuitists debate how far to take their "believe women" mantra when it concerns their own ranks. The aged Biden has a long history of making affectionate contact with women and children at campaign events, a habit which began long before his party's recent Puritan turn against any contact between homo sapiens that isn't explicitly homosexual.

These assaults have recently been used by Pantsuitists to deperson many of their own strongest supporters in order to create openings for younger, dumber replacements. Thanks to the rapid changes in their behavioral rules enabled by taking social media mobs seriously, anyone who subscribes to pantsuit insanity finds themself incapable of defending themself from future charges as popular mores become ever more Puritan. Especially if the only thing moderating the lynch mobs surrounding Biden is that he was Hussein Bahamas's Vice President less than three years ago.

Given the immense size of the field and popular consensus that the incumbent Trump is deeply unpopular, this is set to be an incredibly bloody primary contest.