Church elders in the Diocese of Rochester are calling for the elimination of pointed kitchen knives after having made the religious determination that points on knives are obsolete (archived). Never mind the incredible utility of the knife point in kitchens that handle actual food, the religious imperative to preserve all life demands the kitchen workflow be interupted by specialist knick-knacks out of the potential that any particular knife point may end the life of something other than a garlic clove.

Nevermind that nearly every use of the paring knife or fillet knife begins with the point. Nevermind the ridiculous prospect of scoring with the belly of the blade. The state Church of England demands doctrinal sovereignty in your kitchen, and their doctrine says the potential evil of the knife point trumps the active utility of the knife point.