Hard Freeze Threatens Washington DC Cherry Blossoms With Eradication Tonight

Local weather forecasters are predicting night time temperatures falling to 23 degrees Fahrenheit overnight. Temperatures under 24 degrees Fahrenheit are sufficient to possibly kill this seasons blossom buds on the swamp's beloved cherry trees. Local factions are set to bicker over the meaning of this natural turn with varying factions set to view this as an ominous sign of the God Emperor Trump's looming cuts for the sake of The Great Again or as some climate change circle jerk. Frost happens, per the local department of agriculture March 29th is the local last frost date1 in the swamp.


  1. 50% probability traditionally  

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong>