Growing Criminal Obeast And Transmayo Problem Pushes New Zealand To Plus Sized Handcuffs

As New Zealand Police struggle to control an increasing undisciplined population of obeasts and transmayo gendered individuals they have been pushed to adapt their equipment to the problem. The New Zealand Herald reports that the country's police are trading in their perfectly serviceable cuffs that work to restrain human sized individuals and getting new cuffs that are big enough to restrain Obeasts that ate themselves to the point they lost visible wrists (archived). A spokesman for national headquarters claims the new cuffs adjust sufficiently to continue being effective on more mobile human sized law enforcement prey, but this remains to be seen.

4 thoughts on “Growing Criminal Obeast And Transmayo Problem Pushes New Zealand To Plus Sized Handcuffs

  1. It's them islanders bro, too much fush and chips, bro.

  2. obeasts and transmayo gendered individuals

    wut?

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